There's this website where you can get anonymous messages from anyone. You only need an account to receive messages, not to send them. No, not tumblr. I don't even know when and why this has emerged, but it's there alright. So if you want to tell me something anonymously, do it here:

milkyxcoffee.sarahah.com/

No consequences! I won't share the messages either.

... unless they are funny, like I just got one about pizza. Sorry bud, this is not Pizza Hut :v but if you get that pizza, I want a slice!  


my avatar on the site done by lovely Mayocat  

EDIT: ANSWERS

 Someone mentioned World of Warcraft! I am currently playing on a MoP private server, Tauri, so if anybody wants to join me, I'm on the Evermoon (English) realm, in the guild called "Cash Flow". It's a pretty decent server! Constantly worked on to introduce more content and fix bugs. I haven't run into any game-breaking bugs and maybe 2 quests were not working for me and I'm 50 lvl (yea still questing, I'm only playing during this summer break to see the new content added since TBC because that's the only expansion I played on).

13.08. ANSWERING MADNESS (newest first, each in the language of this question)

 Ładne koniki

 Powiedzieć, że lubię kawę z mlekiem, to stanowczo za mało.

 I am no life.

 Fievel Mousekewitz comes from a movie I haven't really seen, but as soon as I watch it I'll try drawing some characters! And thanks! <3

 Nie będę się pukać w łeb (to jakieś konkretne nawiązanie do czegoś czy spam?)

 Realistka.

 Nie zgadzam się z tym japońskim powiedzeniem.

 Oda była cudowna <33

 Wybieram przyszłość.

 THANK YOU to whoever send the message saying I shouldn't stop drawing (and gave me a cup of coffee), that was so sweet ;v;

 And for the equally nice, shorter messages because I got a few, they were lovely!

 Po polsku też kilka krótszych wiadomości dostałam, bardzo miłych, o mnie i/lub o moich rysunkach i bardzo za nie dziękuję <333

I don't have a place I could call home anymore. At my current place I feel anxious all the time and I really can't get into drawing when someone's around (hence the poll I made a while ago, I was wondering if I'm some kind of freak or if it's a common thing) and at my parents' place... I have to be super quiet and turn the lights off at 7 pm (because of reasons). Even clicking of the mouse is too loud. It's a one room apartment......... so I really don't have much time if we go out for the day, come back and soon after dinner the day's over. We have to go out because it would be weird if we went abroad and didn't see the city. And I love it! But as the time goes on, throughout the last few years I'm thinking more and more that I just... don't like drawing anymore. It's especially hard because it's always been my favourite thing to do, the ultimate way of spending time, expressing myself, fighting my own demons and coping with emotions. It was just me and the pencil, us against the world, and it worked! Now my thoughts are my own doom - "it's ugly, I don't want people to see my failed sketches" and I can't draw in public. "It's pretentious", and I gave up the coolness and badassery because I constantly feel it's too silly. "Nobody would like this", and I forget why I draw in the first place... that I've always been drawing because I wanted to. I can only draw good when I'm really feeling it, when I'm not thinking about anything else, I can spend hours trying to get the drawing to look as much as I imagined it as possible. It's when I draw good. When someone else wants me draw or I'm distracted by others, it's... whatever I think it should be, instead of what I want it to be. 

I wish I could explain it better... I just feel like I'm losing my imagination. I'm trying too hard to be logical and do the right thing just because it should be done and not because I want to. Watching movies, especially animation, seems to help a little but I have a hard time getting to watch anything on my own, and if I watch with someone else then I can't fully experience it, like... emotionally? Jesus I am such a wreck....... 

Does any of you have any tips for... for this? Whatever it is? Something that boosts your imagination, productivity, confidence? something to fight anxiousness? 

BUT I AM FINALLY FREE, YUSSSS!

though I don't feel it at all. It's like even though I don't have anything to work on, no projects, no exams, I feel like I'm wasting time anyway??? Because I could ALWAYS do something better, more productive, more creative, more educational. I've stopped being ambitious a long time ago so why is it still a thing in my head? It makes me feel bad to just sit and stare at a screen watching a movie, but instead I would do literally nothing like browsing the web and looking at memes, which isn't better than that at all. It's similar with drawing - I feel that I should draw more but if I force myself, nothing good comes out. Darn it brain, gimme a break .-.

- I've finished Owlboy though. I need to go back and make it 100% because I know there's more stuff to uncover. (guys you should play it, it's soooo gooood)
- I'll share my last game project here as soon as I get it to work properly on the web (I messed up some files and now it's a glitch fest)
- I'm gonna get back to the folks I promised some ATs!! very soon!! 

... and I'm done with the semester. Unfortunately it is equally as stressful as exams. I have to finish our mobile game project and it's not helping that I'm not entirely familiar with the Clickteam Fusion software. I think I'd rather spend this summer learning C# or java instead of taking on another project in Fusion ;-; It's easy and useful for quick prototyping but when something's messed up in the way the program handles a specific thing, there is no way of fixing it (except for ridiculous workarounds that take too much time). OR I'm just too stupid and doing things wrong x) Either way I need this done by Tuesday, whatever happens on that day I will be free for the summer.